Latch hook is probably the most mysterious of the crafting genres to me, mainly because I don’t understand what you’re supposed to do with the finished product. Do you hang it on the wall? Do you actually use them as rugs? Do you throw them into a secret basket that you never show anyone? I’ve never met anyone who actually makes them as a hobby, so I will of course make a poorly-informed generalization and assume that the purpose of all latch-hooking is to be the subject of an amazing prank craft.
I present to you Exhibit A:
The title is, obviously, Winged Unicorn. It’s on the smaller side, and would make an EXCELLENT bath mat.
Exhibit B:
Also smallish. Perhaps an entryway rug? (Also, is that a single tear coming from the deer’s eye? I HOPE SO.)
And with Exhibit C, I rest my case, your honor:
This one is 30” x 36”. I don’t know— put it in the middle of your guest room? His hair is gorgeous. It’s probably going to take weeks to complete, but you know, all the best prank crafts do. Can you imagine gifting any of these to someone? The thought of the reaction is almost enough to make me head to a JoAnn’s right now. ALMOST.
(Also, if any actual latch-hook aficionados stumble on this post, I am genuinely seeking an answer to the question “What do you do with these?”)
I don’t know what made me google the ol’ Bedazzler just now, but possibly it was God? I just wanted to see if it was still around. And is it ever!
And on looking at it, I just had kind of a brilliant revelation. Do you know what else you can use a latch hook/cross stitch pattern for, besides its intended purpose? Umm, how about as a pattern for THE BEDAZZLER??? Imagine the previously posted Edward from Twilight pattern done entirely in gleaming rhinestones. Are you imagining it? DID YOUR MIND EXPLODE?
Look, I’m not trying to pigeonhole you into prank crafting Twilight stuff exclusively, but …
Come on! Rhinestones. It would probably not even look like a discernible pattern once you finished, but in my mind it is glorious. Bedazzle that onto a sweatshirt and it’s GAME OVER, friends.
One of the major difficulties of prank crafting is answering the question, “Is it worth spending hours of my time creating something that will most likely be mistaken for an item purchased at Goodwill for one dollar?” For me, that answer will always be yes. But it’s a good question to ask yourself when evaluating a potential craft. Prime example, this ship in a bottle:
In this case, the finished product will most likely be mistaken for something you bought at a Galveston Island souvenir shop for $5. If you’re OK with that, you should consider buying this kit for $15. Make it, tell me what the secret is (that pamphlet in the photo is really taunting me), and then gift it to your loved one wearing a thick wool sweater and smoking a pipe. “I made this for ye,” you can say, staring off into the distance. “Best board up the windows, a nor’easter approaches.”
Another genre of crafting that I didn’t even know existed! Beaded banners. This one in particular is kind of the best thing ever just because of the display hanger.
You had me at “brass eagle carrying an enormous torch in front of a setting sun,” craft! I really can’t imagine where you could display this and have it look like intentional decorating, which is what makes it perfect for prank crafting.
This beaded banner business is also a great medium for any kind of cross stitch/latch hook pattern, and you know what that means! Twilight crafts. You can so easily make a Robert Pattinson beaded banner, what’s stopping you? To go with your Jacob latch hook rug! (this could probably also be Justin Timberlake, depending on who your target is …)
